The more minuscule our connection to our own subconscious
the larger the threat of being taken over
by obsession, compulsion, posession and exterior influence
and the farther our dreams run from our grasp
and into our shadows
ON THIS DAY!!!
Take a few moments to FEEL your heart beating within your chest. Can you feel it at its origin? within the flesh itself?
BEGIN at your wrist, feel your pulse, the outward expression of an entirely internal process which is hidden from your consciousness and yet occurs within your own body every minute of every day. CAN YOU FEEL YOURSELF LIVING?
Can you become aware of what occurs within your own flesh?
PLEASE TRY IT!
Start with your pulse, travel up through your rivers of blood. go into your blood. Feel it pull, feel it push.
Feel how it pulls you.
Go up into your arm,
go up into your neck.
Slowly, oh so slowly,
SPEAK YOUR NAME, feel how your blood pushes your throat to open at your command.
Take a deep breath, follow your blood into your chest, feel it swell into your lungs go into your lungs, feel them surround your heart in the center,
feel the blood enter your heart feel it leave your heart,
feel the pulse from where it begins.
SEE the blue flash that creates all movement from whence your tiniest movements arise from this single, repeating pulse that never ends while you are in this form.
Come into a deep embrace with your own animal.
DO NOT IMAGINE IT
DO NOT FANTASIZE
DO NOT CREATE A PHANTOM HEARTBEAT THAT EXISTS IN A WORLD OF GHOSTS
BE within your heart and surrender to its force, feel it in every part of your insides.
Feel your insides.
TRY and make your pulse slow down.
TRY and make your pulse increase.
for just, one moment my love,
die a little bit.
do not breathe, do you feel it fighting?
CAN YOU FEEL IT??
CAN YOU FEEL IT???
Can you hear your heart, do you have the courage to speak its name? Can you link it to your mind?
Can you love it for what it does for you?
If you can, do it now.
It is through the force of my sadness
That I am driven to Joy
My anger, brutal and relentless,
ensures my exaltation in my rise to seek forgiveness
The ravenous beast that is my grief and suffering
has shown me the power that love can bring
I am thinking on how I love you
And it sends me as an arrow
And I am going to my graveyard
And I am going down deep
descending all alone
inside the black parts of my bones
and I am building
in which shall sit
an arrangement of birds
pulling with their wings
straining through my veins
crying out through my eyes
lifting them to the skies
and the Sun
shall take me as its daughter
I will no longer seek a Father
and the garden made of gold
shall a diamond reveal
burning every eel
till the truth be told
Vatican 1550s, from Latin mons Vaticanus, Roman hill on which Papal palace stands. Said to be an Etruscan loan-word, not related to vates “sooth-sayer.”
hallelujah also halleluiah, 1530s, from Hebrew hallalu-yah “praise ye Jehovah,” from hallalu, plural imperative of hallel “to praise” also “song of praise,” from hillel “he praised,” of imitative origin, with primary sense being “to trill.” Second element is yah, shortened form of Yahweh, name of God. Replaced variant formation alleluia (12c.).
Hallel: A jewish festival of reading the psalms:
“Its place following Sukkot suggests that God wants to memorialize what is planned for when the time period of “wandering” in these mortal bodies and rebellious minds finally comes to an end, and humankind enters total lasting “rest.” […]”-Hallel Fellowship
WANDER: from PIE root *wendh- “to turn, wind, weave” (see wind (v.1))
wind (v.1) “move by turning and twisting,” Old English windan “to turn, twist, plait, curl, brandish, swing” (class III strong verb; past tense wand, past participle wunden), from Proto-Germanic*windan “to wind”
I was having a discussion about magical types of things,
with a person,
and the person I was having the discussion with
quite matter of factly,
that they did not believe in magic.
So I stated I thought that was fine because belief was actually not necessary, it could be experienced first hand.
“prove it” was the response.
name something you want.
Ok, I want a cupcake, with a cherry on the top. I want a cupcake with a cherry on top on the corner of my desk.
If you can make a cupcake with a cherry on it appear on my desk, magic is real.
I took a piece of paper and said ok,
as I drew with a pencil a picture of a cupcake, I said, like this? is this what you want?
Yes that is it, that is exactly what I want, was the reply.
Ok fine, but time is funny with magic, so give it a little time.
So, we waited.
a child came into his office and was sitting at his desk,
the child had drawn, with a pencil and paper
a picture of a cupcake,
with a cherry on top.
and left it in the exact corner of the desk.
A literal translation of the request, the exact replica of the object projected.
And then we
stopped having conversations
about whether or not magic was real.
I can hear the cry of my spirit
It shrieks and moans
Please please please
Love love love
Dream dream dream
I am possessed
as if I have a second skin
I am as an animal
It only wants to eat
the black hole of desire
Such is the nature of the suffering of the world.
When the call to consume
defeats and deafens
the screams of dreams and love,
the entities and enemies swarm with delight
as baleful bees
apocalypse is accomplished
through strategic orchestration
the vampire invited over the threshold
just for the thrill
The satanic invocation
The promethean deception
is the trick of the light
That in order for our spirit to survive this world
It must murder our animal
But just you Try
To kill an animal
With naught but feathers of wings
And gossamer rainbow light.